Send This Site to a Friend

5 Sexual Myths Destructive to Your Relationship
Cynthia Perkins, M.Ed.,


In this era where sex seems to be on the mind of everyone and
talked about more openly than ever before, it is surprising that
there continues to be a lot of misinformation and misconceptions.
These myths perpetuate unhealthy patterns of relating, expectations
and satisfaction and have the potential to destroy a relationship.
Don't allow your relationship to fall prey to the following myths:


A Good Relationship Shouldn't Have Any Sex Problems

All couples will probably experience some sexual problems at
some point. This does not mean your relationship is over or not a
good one. If the problems are not addressed and worked out,
then your relationship could be in jeopardy, but the mere existence
of problems is not a sign of failure, it's a normal part of relationships.

Your partner's sexual needs may change over time. Stress and major
life changes are an inevitable part of everyone's life. These kinds
of issues can cause change in levels of desire, satisfaction etc. and
will require periods of adjustment.


Size Matters
This simply is not true. In an attempt to make money, the media
continues to keep this destructive myth alive, making men feel
inadequate and self-conscious. They set up expectations that are
impossible for a man to live up to and make them falsely believe
that this is what a woman wants.

This is absurd. You do not need a big penis to be an incredible
lover and satisfy your woman. Only the first third of a woman's
vagina has nerve endings for feeling, the other two thirds has no
feeling, so even a small penis is quite capable of stimulating the
first third. What are most important to a woman is what kind of
lover you are, what kind of person you are, how you feel
about her and how you treat her. Making your woman feel loved,
special, cherished, appreciated and desired will make sex great for her.


A Woman Should Orgasm with Intercourse Alone
The majority of women cannot orgasm with intercourse alone,
regardless of how big the penis is, because it does not provide
sufficient stimulation to the clitoris. Many couples struggle needlessly,
believing that one of them is doing something wrong if they are
not able to achieve this. Using positions that stimulate the clitoris
during intercourse may work for some, such as the woman on
top or the riding high missionary. You can also stimulate the
clitoris with a finger or a vibrator during intercourse or give your
woman her satisfaction by pleasuring her orally or manually.


My Partner Should Know How to Pleasure Me
Without My Telling Them

Your partner is not a mind reader. Lack of communication is
one of the biggest factors in sexual dissatisfaction. Yes, most
people know the basics, but everyone has unique sexual needs that only
they are aware of. You must teach your partner what it is that
you need. Don't be shy! Be specific and detailed.


It Shouldn't Take Work to Keep Passion Alive

Yes, we would all love to live in the land of fairy tales, but
unfortunately it just does not exist! Once again the media is
largely responsible for promoting an ideal that just isn't realistic.
Relationships go through cycles and levels of passion will vacillate.
In the early stages of love passion is a blazing inferno that can't
be put out and doesn't require any work, but as the relationship
progresses, passion will not stay alive without effort. You must
nurture your relationship to keep passion alive.


Cynthia Perkins, M.Ed., is a sex advisor/educator and author helping
monogamous couples increase intimacy, be better lovers and
keep the passion alive. She is also author of the hot new sex guide
for couples titled, Smoldering Embers-Hot Erotic Stories and Sex
Tips to Light a Couple's Fire. Subscribe to her FREE Monthly Ezine,
Smoldering Embers, and get hot sex tips, techniques and secrets.
http://www.smolderingembers.com/

Also See:

Better Sex & Sexuality Issues

All About Relationships

Our Health and Wellness Center