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Sex and Fire: A New View Of Evolution
Staci Backauskas


What if humans had hindered the development of fire the way we've
impeded the evolution of our beliefs about sex? We'd be living in huts,
spearing fish, wearing thatch and possess limited knowledge of world.
No computers. No microwaves. No cell phones. Not a Target in site.


As modern-day humans, we smile at the thought that thousands of
years ago, our species used feet as their sole means of transportation.
We beam in amazement at the inventiveness of cavemen who used
stones to create fire to warm themselves and cook their food. We
even, with a touch of arrogance, pity Third World countries whose
citizens don't drive cars or have indoor plumbing. And who don't
know the tongue-tingling pleasure of a well-made Creme Brulee.

In hindsight, we can see the process of fire as a tool. It was
discovered, at a time when wearing leaves and bones was considered
haute couture. Without Caveman Bob rubbing rocks together, our
existence would be quite different. The domino theory would be in
full effect. For starters, we would not be driving. There would be
no tires because there would be no rubber because there would
be no vulcanization because there was no fire.


So why, as a society, do we still consider sex between men and
women to be the pinnacle of validating our genderhood? The
concept of sex has been around much longer than the wheel or
coal-burning engines. What type of evolution has it experienced?
Our concept of what sex's role should be in our culture has been
stagnated by societal beliefs. In Western culture, being abstinent
or choosing an alternative lifestyle is still considered to be outside
the boundaries of normal societal behavior.


Orthodox religions pontificate about how sex should occur only
between a man and a woman for the purpose of continuing the
species. Could it be that the belief that sex is necessary for
procreation is as primitive as starting a fire with a flint? Is it possible,
after the fateful day when Adam and Eve bit the apple, that sex
startled and confused humans? And having taken a nip from the
tree of knowledge, instead of a hearty gulp, they came up with
the "sex only for procreation" theory?


The Encyclopedia Britannica reveals that for years Peking Man
(who lived about 500,000 BC), was believed to be the earliest
user of fire. Evidence uncovered in Africa in the 1980s, however,
suggests that our ancestors were using fire 1.4 million years ago.
But it wasn't until around 7000 BC that they developed reliable
fire-making techniques. The process of harnessing fire went
through fits of stops and starts.


It took man almost a million years to go from inventing fire to
being able to really control it. Even when primitive man figured
out how to manage fire, it was still easier to keep a fire going than
to put it out and re-ignite it later. Is it possible that the "scientific
breakthroughs," which now allow humans to conceive without
actual intercourse, are nothing but a step in the process of
sexual evolution?


Sex, like fire, has had its share of bumps along path of development.
For the most part, it has been viewed with uncompromising
undertones. There have been those who were brave enough
to have stepped outside society's box. Medieval Wicca, for
example, used Tantric-type sex in their rituals to celebrate Beltane.


The one consistent thread is that anyone who had sex without
procreating or claiming to enjoy it has been ostracized. Puritanical
beliefs, from Jesus' time to the Salem Witch trials to Dr. Laura,
have thwarted the evolution of our concept of sex. This leads to
an important question: Who says that sex should only be used
for procreation? Or that it is a necessary part of life at all?


Many will cite the Bible. But we need to remember that the Bible
was written two thousand years ago by men who believed that
women and cows were both chattel. Who used camels for
transportation and urinated in the desert. The Bible says nothing
about Jesus preaching that sex was strictly about producing children.


There is mention in the bible of Jesus being chaste. But because
of questionable accuracy, we'll never know whether or not
Jesus actually had sex. He certainly had ample opportunity.
But is it possible that he knew that spiritual growth was more
fulfilling than satisfying a strictly human need?


In Gary Zukav's book, Seat of the Soul he claims that the ultimate
satisfaction is obtained through successful spiritual partnerships,
as opposed to traditional marriages. In discussing this concept,
he outlines the purpose of such a relationship: to set aside your
personality needs in order to accommodate the needs of your
partner's spiritual growth. By doing so, you grow yourself,
co-creating your soul's evolution.


There's no doubt that sex can be a pleasurable, even bone-rattling,
experience. But is it something that is required for self-actualization?
Movies, sitcoms, music, magazines and a myriad of other
sources tell us it that is. Each of us needs to listen to our own
spirit to determine what works in our lives. Society cannot
make that decision for us.


It's also important to understand that straddling the fence creates
real suffering. Denying what you know will allow you to be
joy-filled because of the artillery of messages you receive to
the contrary is only going to cause pain. And it will be a much
more substantial pain than the surface cuts caused by societal ridicule.


Imagine that each one of us makes a conscious decision to allow
our perception of sex to evolve. Imagine that we enter into
spiritual partnerships as opposed to traditional marriages.
What will the results be? No jealous lover's quarrels. No pain
over unfulfilled expectations. No unrequited "love." No questioning
our value as a person because someone doesn't want to have
sex with us. That's a world I'd like to live in.


Submitted by: Staci Backauskas, author of the spiritual fiction novel,
The Fifth Goddess, is a teacher, speaker whose articles have appeared
on numerous spiritually oriented Internet sites. She moved on from a
13 year advertising career two years ago to pursue her dream of
writing fulltime and is also the founder of her own virtual spiritual
community at http://www.fifthgoddess.com 
 

 

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